april 2026

MORNING:

• ImSom (a little: did some work on the summary for session 0.5)
• "IRL" career (decent: checked, studied and looked at wireless microphones)
• Texted Val gm (yay)
• other than that: I woke up late, got up late (scared and stressed out for the hostile environment), dealt with my physical issues

AFTERNOON:

• Work->OUT (big: did my cardio in the bathroom)
• other than that: I played a looot of Pokémon Champions and reached Ultra Ball Rank 2, almost Rank 1 (decided to stop when I realized I was quite sad that I was wasting yet another day, so I went onto the next things, in the Evening section

EVENING:

• Reading (a little: at a certain point I managed to grab "The Society Without Pain" by Byug-Chul Han, I reflected a lot on the very first 2 pages and then,)
• Thesis (decent: then I took notes based on what I read, with some cross-thoughts with other sources and other ideas for the thesis. I did well)
• other than that: I took a shampoo, wherein I resolved to do the next things in line, then I cooked dinner

NIGHT:

• Ro0m 1: (yay: started writing a pen letter to Phonpho. This counts as Ro0m, because you, my Ro0m, are the place where I learn to take up space and to have a personal life. The pen letter is the same. It's helping me see that I do exist, and that helps me actually exist. I'll probably expand on it)
• Ro0m 2: (yay: am doing it right now even if super sleepy: I wanted to do all this, writing down what I did in my day. I'll do this everyday and I'll learn to format it easily, so that it can be as immediate as possible. I want to experience every day and come at night thinking that it did indeed happen, and I didn't get swept away in the flow of time)
• Texted Val gn (will do soon)
• other than that: I saw tina online, I streamed myself playing Dolce Flirt. It was v nice and cute, although my throat hurts, but I love tina very much

OVERALL: I'll say eventually

MORNING:

• woke up late
• got up and active late (lots of physical issues)
• Text Val gm
• Thesis: some scaletta work (mostly just formatting)
• "IRL" career: looked at mics. the one I already have is best anyway, but now I know. as for the non-usb mic, I will consider one with wires instead cause why the heck not. I really dislike the quality of the JDI, but I do agree that it's the best value... if you want it wireless. I can probably find something as cheap with wires, but with the audio quality I'm looking for

AFTERNOON:

• prep + ate lunch
• work->OUT (good effects, I'm glad I forced myself)
• RoomFix (the adrenaline from the workout helped); it counts as Ro0m 1
• organized mentally, did timetables, I have new weekly and monthly planners now. hopefully that aids the daily planner. for the first time in my life, I may finally get stable routines! Let's hope so!!!

EVENING:

• Ro0m 2: did tables here
• organized more
• ImSom (ok work, better than the past few days, even if not still good. ... I need to be kinder to myself, I've literally had migraines and issues all the time)
• organized more
• had dinner

NIGHT:

• organized more
• Ro0m 3 (bonus!): am doing this (I think it feels good, mostly because I copypasted the code and only have to write)
• Reading: will do soon
• Text Val gn: will do soon

OVERALL:

• Tod4y (I will explain why I say tod4y and yesterd4y) I did less thesis work and it was less spiritually strong than yesterd4y, which made me feel for most of my d4y like crap; but work->OUT helped, especially cause I didn't feel like doing it, but shaking my body truly shook the mind too. It is true that sometimes, if the mind needs help, it needs the support of something else (in this case the body, which is weary and hurt, so of course it's so hard). I did a bit more of ImSom than usual, and while it's nowhere near as much as I'd like to do, it's certainly something, which makes me feel productive. And tbh, I did a loooot of designing for my life and my future, and I think I made the job of future me much easier (and kinda more fun?). Unrelated: almost reached Master Ball Tier in Pokémon Champions, I was missing just one win but dang I lost it all rip. Tomorrow I need to remember to add unnumbered lists here, it's easy but takes a long time -- I need to find someplace to write templates

MORNING:

• Texted Val (hi)
• ImSom: a lot (relatively). If I keep this up, next week I may be done with the summary of session 0.5. Maybe even further.
• Ro0m 1: did templates here in this page. Now I have a format (this thing you're reading right now) that can work indefinitely
• Blue Fulgens: bought and checked out the course of an artist I admire, a course on 3d modeling, because I want to make my own model. I think it's possible. I'm a person who commits, I can take hundreds hours on a single thing... I've put them for others countless times, I can definitely do that for this thing, even if it's "unnecessary" (it'd be faster to get money elsewhere and commission someone, but yk. I want it to be personal. So I want to at least try)

AFTERNOON:

• lunch prep & eat
• nap

EVENING:

• Pokémon (reached Master Ball Tier in Champions, I wanted to be proud of it but then the arguments started)
• time just passed
• prepped dinner

NIGHT:

• had dinner
• Texted Val (bye)
• Ro0m 2: am writing this rn. Glad I do at least this

OVERALL:

• Besides what I wrote already, what's worth mentioning is that I started trying to follow the weekly and monthly time organization, where I have certain time allotments each d4y for each activity. In total it's about 6.45h of work, and I think that can be sustainable, especially in the way I alloted it and especially after seeing how it worked tod4y, even if sleep deprived. In particular: tea was nice, and I'm pretty sure having a snack mid morning and mid afternoon boosts my metabolism in ways I need.
• What hasn't happened tod4y was Work->OUT, Reading and Thesis ("IRL" career is interchangeable with Blue Fulgens). Thesis, I get it. I need lots of motivation and mindspace even to just sit there and stare at the screen, and with that sleep deprivation, it would've been hard. The plan was to read first, then use that to motivate me to write something, since I inevitably think a lot everytime I read anything. But I didn't do the reading either, because time started flying and when it stopped doing that, the hostility began. So... tod4y is the first failure. I don't know how to feel about it. Frankly, I'm just too exhausted to feel in general. It takes a lot of strength for me to feel. Even the pride I was feeling this morning was something I sort of forced myself to feel. So maybe I'll just accept it. Tom4rrow is a new d4y, even if I'll have the internship and it'll be strange. Next week I will have a good streak, I know it

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